Please no one text me.

Please no one text me. Every time I hear it come in I feed my dogs.
— me.

Obtaining fame before the Internet

Before the Internet, Youtube, Instagram, and Reality Shows, aparently the quickest way to fame was to break up with Carly Simon.
— me.

Putin reappears after 10 day absence, tired but satisfied, promises no spoilers...

After much speculation about the reason for his 10-day disappearance from public view, Vladimir Putin has reemerged. The Russian President announced that he is "tired, but satisfied" after binge watching the complete 3rd season of "House of Cards". The Slavic strongman promises no spoilers "unless NATO continues its expansion plans in Eastern Europe".